I took Creole's advice and double booked dates yesterday...
Date #1: Cheap and hot...
In the morning, I met up with a new Pot... I call Mr Boondocks...
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| Mr Boondocks |
He said he was cleaning out his old building because he's moved into another.... Whatever... Immediately, my eyes went to his hair... Brother was rocking thin cornrows--but his hairline was about 1 1/2" behind where it should have been... Also, he had at least 3 tattoos covering each square inch of his body. Where did you say you worked, again???
Since he was still at work, and we were meeting for only lunch, he took me to ((wait for it)) Golden Krust... I was in there, and it took me a while to figure out if it was really happening... I ordered a large oxtail (which I knew I wouldn't eat), and played with the food while he talked about his tattoos, his sister, etc etc... I could tell he was nervous... He hardly touched his food...
After about 15 minutes, we left, and I had about 45 minutes to spare before my next date--with Mr SJP... The two of us just walked around the city... We talked about our interests, and quickly realized that we both played tennis. I found that extremely hard to believe. Since we hadn't already discussed any arrangement terms, I figured I'd use this commonality to ease it in... We set our next date to be on the tennis courts, and I brought up the bet... If I beat him in a match (which I will), he takes me shopping... If not, he insisted I make him dinner... All I could think was "you better have a microwave-able meal waiting for you at home"...not happening... He was excited... Mr Boondocks walked me to the train, and paid for my ticket... I got on, and he called once I was gone...
Mr Boondocks explained that he had just gotten out of something long, that ended badly... I expressed sorrow and cut to the chase... I asked him what he was looking for, what he had planned for me and he simply said that he wants to get to know me, and support me...
Something in me is telling me that this guy is looking for a relationship... I will definitely have to make things more black and white between us two... Depending on our next date, I will make that happen.
Date #2: Creepy & A Groper
So, my second date was with Mr SJP... I got off the train, and waited for him... I would have minded the wait, but I used the 30 minutes to get myself together for it. I've gotten plenty of advice that getting there a little early is worth it... Boy, was I in for a surprise...
Mr SJP looked nothing like his photos... He was tall, thin, and really, quite unattractive... On a 1-10 scale, this Pot ranked a serious .5-1... Seriously...
((I've decided to change his photo because the one I had before did him way too much justice...
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| Mr SJP |
So, I got in his car... Earlier that day, I'd picked up some mace, and a little flip-knife... And we drove to (wait for it) Applebees... *sigh* On the long drive there, we small talked... He explained that he was more than impressed with my physical appearance, but was a bit angry with me for the conversation we'd had earlier... Mr SJP also tossed the question around us having sex again... I swear ladies, I wanted to throw up in my mouth...
We got to the steakhouse, and I ordered a drink... He claimed he had an alcohol problem, and just got water... The meal was okay, again, I played around with my food, while he complained the whole time...
- It was not hot enough
- It was too spicy
- My plate had more on it than his
- The waiter was flirting with me
- It was too dark
- Why couldn't they change the channel on the damned televisions?
On the way back, he asked me about my sexual preferences, and I let him know... He said he was looking for a very sexually open SB... I however, was not that, but he insisted he could change my mind--and flashed a really crooked smile... All I could think was "if you have all of this money, why can't you get your teeth fixed, at the least?"
Before I knew what hit me, I felt his ashy hand on my thigh... Ladies, I didn't know what to do... Next, he was pulling down my dress to see the color of my bra... I had to stop him... It was disgusting... Ugh!!!! The whole ride home, he literally begged me to go home with him... "But you're so hot.... Please...??? I'll give you double..." I couldn't believe it... Beyond gross...
Once we got back to the train, I hopped out, and turned my head before he could kiss me.... A smile, and a wave... and he was watching my ass practically run towards the escalator...
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Now, ladies... Help me out here...
- I am not used to being with men that I am not physically attracted to. I know that I won't find a looker every time, but gosh... Not like this... How do you deal with this? Is it something I'll just have to learn to deal with?
- How do I break it onto Mr Boondocks that I am looking for a strict SD/SB relationship. That I don't want to be his girlfriend...? Without jeopardizing my chances at him sprinkling some sugar my way...??? Have you ever experienced a guy like this?
- What to do with gropers... If he were anyone else, I would have called the police... Was he correct to have done this? Clearly Mr SJP wants sexual favors from me. But I know that there is no way...NO WAY i can have sex with him... no way... I also know that he won't give up any sugar until he gets mine... Should I let this go with him?
Oh wow...yeah I don't bother with the thugs because (not to stereotype, but I am) I feel like they come with way too much drama and big talk, little show...unless he's a famous rapper or athlete, yeah they get no love. Chances are he ain't gonna be some CEO tatted up like that.
ReplyDeleteThere are some guys I wouldn't sleep with for less than $10,000 haha. If a guy was too touchy feely, I speak up for myself, as tactfully as I can and just tell him to be a gentleman and have some self control. Don't put yourself in uncomfortable situations, or you'll hate sugar dating.
I noticed a lot of guys want real relationships...I personally only want strictly sugar, but I tell guys like that if it leads to more and the feelings are mutual then I'm open to more (I'm really not)...I mean he can't be mad that I don't ever fall in love (I guess he could lol).
That's just my 2 cents :P
You made me spit out my water at the screen - the contrast between the pics was hilarious!
ReplyDeleteI'll try to help best I feel I can....
1. If you are so unattracted to someone that it makes you feel uncomfortable, perhaps that is your intuition telling you 'no'. An arrangement (especially one with any promise of longevity) must have a certain degree of attraction - physical or otherwise. You know what physical shortfalls you can tolerate, but it may seem that being with a guy that turns you off so much will ultimately show and might not make you feel so good inside. Just think it through.
2. I think the main difference between online and real life is that in the online world, you have both joined a sugar site thus are both entitled to be transparent with your wants. He knew what site he was on, so you shouldn't feel hesitant to state what you are looking for. After all, he has told you what he wants (i.e. more of a relationship thing). So why can't you do the same? If it is strictly SD/SB, you want then tell him. He might be willing to try it out in the end (nothing ventured nothing gained), but if not then you are each not wasting the others time and can respectfully move on.
3. Mr SJP was dead wrong. Sadly he did this prob because the lady before him let him get away with it. I've had gropers and I've been tolerant and I've respectfully put them in their place. But to be honest, that is more than they deserve. I came to the realisation that this is MY body, it is precious, it is beautiful and I should NOT be nice to men who try to disrespect it by copping a quick feel. It is not as harmless an action as I once thought, it is deeply disrespectful, especially when said man has done nothing - absolutely NOTHING - to entitle him to it. So please - try to have a zero tolerance to men like this. Once you show your disgust, slap such men then walk away, maybe then they'll get the message.
^^ OK, maybe not slap. I don't want to condone violence, but you get the message ;-)
ReplyDeletelol... Thank you so much Eden... it was really bothering me... Yesterday, I called it off with him... 1) I couldn't bare to stand at him... and 2)He made me feel so uncomfortable...
ReplyDeleteI totally agree with you... My body is MINE, and any man who touches it better get the approval, and deserve it...
On to the next one...